Invite me to your party
Invite me to your party
So I don’t crash your gate
I promise to be hearty
I’ll not turn up late
Invite me to your party
Give me the wink and nod
Don’t think I will be naughty
I’m a happy little sod
Invite me to your party!
I need to have some fun
Invite me to your party!
I know your having one
Invite me to your party!
Don't leave me off your list
Invite me to your party!
I won't get fucking pissed
I promise to be sociable
to chat and just sip wine
I won't be unapproachable
like I was last time
No pizzas used as frisbees
No vol-au-vents or sauce
Thrown at the over- fifties
No drumsticks up the arse
Below are a series of alternate endings to this poem
Invite me to your party
I promise I will come
I won’t bring anybody else
Just me and your mum
Invite me to your party
You never know your luck
Or you can send me twenty quid
And I won't bother turning up
Invite me to your party
I don't want to Pester
Send the Invitation to
Doc Hannibal Lector
Invite me to your party
Don't tell the flying squad
I'll bring along the meat pies
Your best friend Sweeney Todd
Invite me to your party
Give me one last chance
My hands will cease to wander
And my cock stays in my pants
If I come to your party
I'll really try my best
and if you do I promise you
I'll wear more than my vest
Invite me to your party
Come on don't be a louse
When all is said and done
The party's at my house!
Main poem: Barry Ferguson - Alternate endings: Paul Blackburn & Nat Clare © 2006 All rights reserved